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This blog is about Fibromyalgia, chronic illness and chronic pain. I myself have chronic migraines, Fibromyalgia, asthma, hypothyroidism and hypermobility syndrome. I introspect about the experience of living with chronic illness and chronic pain. I also will post research and articles. Occasionally you will see book reviews or item reviews of things I have found. I write around average two posts a week but occasionally when I have more to say it will be more. Feel free to subscribe to the email list, at the bottom of this page and also listed on the main page.

On my Header menu you will see a Fav Post and in there you can check out some of the favorite viewer posts. There is also a running favorite post along the side bar as well. Also along that menu are links to my Facebook Page Making Invisible Disabilities Visible, my Tumblr account, my Twitter account a my migraine only account. The final two categories 'All drugged up' are my current prescription protocol and 'my novels' is my fiction writing section as I write fiction as well. Feel free to explore.

BIO

I have been chronically ill in one way or another since I was a child starting with hypermobility syndrome that gave me a joint pain and insomnia. It wasn't until I was a teen though that the joint pain, fatigue and insomnia picked up the pace and I was having difficulties. Skipping school to sleep and so forth. However, it took until I was 20 to be officially diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. I received no treatment for it though. I was told I was too 'young for it'. Not sure if that was ageism or some gender bias thrown in there as well. Either way it took until I was in my thirties to be put on Lyrica. I began to get migraines with aura when I was 20 as well. These progressively got more frequent as time passed. I developed persistent migraine auras. And migraine associated vertigo. Somewhere around 2000 they became daily and have been there since. Migraines they did however treat quite a bit or attempted to. I haven't really responded to preventatives except mildly to Topamax.

The impact of all this has taken a toll on my life and career. Or what career more like. I was on an academic path when the migraines gained severity. I was finishing my Masters. It became clear I wouldn't be able to go for my phd until I had some sort of effective treatment. I didn't know at the time the most effective possible outcome for a preventative was 50% and I'd never see it. So I took time off to find more effective treatment. Which I never found, but did discover rapidly that working was much worse due to painsomnia and sleep deprivation issues. So I had a hard time just finding a job to maintain. I did eventually give up on the idea of even attaining my phd and just finding a career. To that end I found a job at a bank as a lending/investment officer. However the untreated pain was far too intense. Unmanaged pain and full-time work had the best of me. I tried to push through it and did for years. But in the end it led to a suicide attempt. Then another. Things changed for the better when I changed doctors, was sent to the pain clinic and a new neuro as well as put on a mood modify medication that didn't have the side effect of suicidal ideation for me. The pain clinic told my straight up I could only work part-time so I changed roles to a teller at the bank to reduce my hours. And even this is difficult to maintain, but far less stressful.

My coping strategies have improved and evolved over time. However I still deal with depression associated with chronic pain that compromises my coping at times. It is a difficult road we travel. I don't always cope well with it. 



  1. Email: myth1977@gmail.com is primary nikki3albert@gmail.com is secondary.
  2. Making Invisible Disabilities Visible- on Facebook Making-Invisible-Disabilities-Visible
  3. You can Twitter me for BrainlessBlogger related things, migraine related, FMS related, @nikki_albert

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Popular posts from this blog

Signs the pain is getting the best of you

100 Symptoms of Fibromyalgia

There was a site that had this and I had linked to it on Tumblr but it is gone. So I had to hunt down someone who found my post and posted the whole thing in a forum. Anyway it is around but I'm posting it here so I will not have to hunt it down to reference it. Now we all know the major symptoms are the wide-spread pain, but our pain isn't just muscle pain... it can be nerve types of pain as well, and the fatigue and the insomnia. And even among symptoms there are some far more frequent than others, but it should be said we have categories... like the cognitive dysfunction, which is a broad one that has more than one symptom and we often just say fibrofog. The insomnia... more than one sleeping disorder. So the list is interesting.




GENERAL
__ Fatigue, made worse by physical exertion or stress
__ Activity level decreased to less than 50% of pre-illness activity level
__ Recurrent flu-like illness
__ Sore throat
__ Hoarseness
__ Tender or swollen lymph nodes (glands), especiall…

Getting through the high intensity pain flares #Blogboost

The crowded me out of the brain. Making no room for anything else. Distraction was impossible. You feel almost frantic with the pain but must be still.

What do you do? To get through it when you have no distraction?

I ask me this as I am really in the depths of a 9 level frantic level of pain right now. Hoping maybe some writing will be a distraction, but it isn't. As I said, the pain crowds the brain. I have to focus real hard to write and my head isn't clear. Too much pain to focus well. Things become quite difficult to do. 

I will say this: We cannot function. We have to just cope with the pain.

But we are Immersed in the pain, we what do we do?
We can and should rest and get through it the best we can. Here are some of the things I do to get through it.

Relaxation breathing: I can't meditate when in high levels of pain. It just makes me think about how much pain I am in. Just not a good idea. But I do do relaxation breathing. I close my eyes. I focus on my breathing. I even…